Say It Ain't So

September 11th Memory Lapse
by Just Add Kids Founder, Paula Herrmann

Back-to-School Coma? I swear I live my life like a marketing campaign sometimes. (Previous campaign: End of School Year Hangover, which I think I just overcame a couple of weeks ago, right?). I don't know where my mind has been lately. Um let's see...4 kids, 4 different schools; surgery for the dog; car problems; new JAK staff, rummage sale... Well, there is more, but I think you get the picture. I'm freaking busy as all get out. I was not reminded of today's day of remembrance until late last night, something brief on the news. I didn't even have the subject on the docket for this week's blog. How in the world could I forget?

In year's past, I'd approach and live through this anniversary heavy-hearted. Eerily, each year's September 11th to me, seemed to mimic the clear day that we had back on that Tuesday in 2001. Today, with all due respect, I didn't somberly tune into the news as I typically would in year's past. And the weather today, didn't remind me of 9/11/01. Read More...

On that beautiful clear crisp Tuesday morning back in 2001, I was getting ready for work. I was in the bathroom and listening to the radio. The news at the top of the hour (8am) reports that a plane (probably a small passenger plane) had crashed into one of the World Trade Center's towers in New York.

Curious, I walked into the living room to see if they had anything about it on the Today Show. The TV, which was still on from my morning watch, caught live that second plane hit the other tower. Oh my gosh, did I really see that? All other broadcast spectators, commentators, hosts, and the world was all trying to process that too.

The events of the day endlessly seemed to unfold. And the knees beneath me continued to weaken.  I will never forget the feelings of uncertainty and insecurity.  Me...now pregnant with my third child.

My husband was making his daily trek, dropping off our 1st grader and pre-schooler at their school.  The anticipation of him walking in the door seemed to last forever. I needed him to join me, standing there in awe in front of the TV.  Frozen...what do you do?

My office was in the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel building in Sturtevant at the time.  Kinda a quiet little place.  A few reporters, distribution people, and me.  I was sure that even our quaint newsroom would be "a buzz" today.  I get there...there is NO ONE there.  I connect with my boss in Milwaukee.  We were all numb.  How do you work when your world is under attack?  Do I go pick my kids up at school?

Crash after crash, it was more than I could process physically by myself.  This beautiful day was nothing but gray....the smoke, the ashes, the future.  The blue skies were eerily peaceful.  I would probably freak out if I saw a plane.  Your family, friends, safety and the horror we all were experiencing with the devastating events...was all you thought about.  And now, in a few months, I would be bringing another precious child into this world of uncertainty.

CNN was on continuously for days.  Reports from New York, Washington, and the middle east all day and night.  I was soon captivated by CNN chief international correspondent, Christiane Amanpour's reports in the middle east: terrorism, bin Laden and al-Qaeda .  Topics that I probably never paid any attention to, if I had even ever heard of them before, were catapulted to the forefront of the news, lunch discussions, and my thoughts.

As I reminisce, 12 years ago seems just like yesterday to me, though I don't get nervous when a commercial airline flies overhead.  I don't, however, enjoy flying.  I am suspicious of passengers for some reason that I don't seem to trust.  Time has quickly slipped us back into our day to day, though I know, just like me, you haven't forgotten.  I have a daily reminder, my daughter, Christiane, who was born 7 months later.

Rest in peace all victims of 09/11/2001. And to the endless list of heroes from that day...the military, law enforcement and rescue who continue to risk their lives every day to protect the citizens of this great country, I thank you. I will never forget.